Thursday, July 31, 2008
I have no title for this
WEETS. I'M A HAPPY GIRL. Okay. But i'm bored now. Very bored and tired. BOO!! And alright. I thought mentor would take a long time to 'unlock' my blog. Little did i think that it would only need ONE NIGHT. Since i have nothing much to talk about. Let's reply Mentor's tag. Though i had replied it in the tagboard already. Urms. BO. I can't help but update my blog, you see. I'm always bored and blogging is one way to relieve it. *grins* *looking at the hammer which is still stuck to your head* *suppress laughter* HA IN YOUR No lah, mentor. We shouldn't do things halfway. Either we go all out or we don't go at all. So you can't only sponsor a portion of it. Either you pay for ALL or you pay for ALL. *grins* Not much choice, eh? But i DID give you a chance to choose though. xDD And but of course. Who else could be fairer than Joycelyn? MWAHAHAHHA!! *psst, i hope EMP camp's BBQ isn't on the 19th. PLEASE SAY NO!!* And no offense, mentor. Peace. ^^V. You're still our best mentor. Okay. And today's dinner wasn't as fun. BOO!! All of us were too tired to train our abs by laughing. Eeeekkkks!!! AND AND AND I LOVE MY COMPUTING'S COMMENT. Your team did a marvellous job with the powerpoint presentation. I wanted to elevate each and everyone of you by one grade but some of you have already hit the max and there's nothing beyond 'A'. And yes. How come no one understand my love for computing? Especially DIT seniors. Mentor said that he hate JAVA in his MSN PM. ANdy complained about JAVA. And for Clement, i'm not too sure. But i doubt he love it too. Probably JAVA is wayyyyy harder than computing. That's why i can't understand their pain for JAVA. But still let me boast a little of my Computing grades. B, B, B, A, A, B, A, A, B, A, A, A, A, A. You might think these grades are average. But As are hard to attain in his class, alright? He rarely gives A. Ask Ben's team and see him rant. They even confronted him about their grades. And another good news. My C+ in UT2 for Science is finally balanced out. I've got an A for UT3. HENG AR!!! Alright. It's almost 11 and i haven't bathe yet. Before i stink anyone out, i better go enjoy the trickle of warm water. P/s: BOTH MENTOR AND ANDY DO READ MY BLOG. (That was what i was happy about.) And ANdy was shocked that i called him cute in geeky specs. Or was he shocked because i saw him in school. *scratches chin* I wonder~~ P/p/s: Haylie. The mentor i was talking about in my previous post is not our mentor. I was referring to Wei Yi. Why would our computing faci come here? AND HE DOESN'T KNOW MY LINK, REMEMBER? P/p/p/s: I know what headgear i'm going to wear on Weds. You will never know how NORMAL i can look. P/p/p/p/s: CHALET DETAILS: Place: Pasir Ris CostaSands Date: 18th - 20th August in the year 3014* BBQ: 19th night Names: - Going for all 3D2N Juliet, Fareez, Yvonne, Benjamin, Jeff, Han Hui, Gui Liang, Hidayah, Mike, Suhari, Guo Hao - Not staying overnight Azhar, Murni, Alia, Surayah - Only coming for BBQ Sharlini, Weiling, Shalom - Unconfirmed Sharlini, Sharlom, Xin Yi - Only coming for first day but will try to make it for BBQ JOYCELYN!!! Omigosh. I hope none of them will see this. OKAY. IT'S 11 ALREADY. AND I SHOULD BATHE NOW!!! To: Mentor Alright. I need to sleep and stop blogging. UT IN LESS THAN 8 HOURS. Anyway, i had been blogging about ANdy because that i felt unjust for him. People had been going to his blog and throwing him critisizim which is UNTRUE. If i felt nothing, isn't that worse? So mentor, READ LIAO AR? Understood-ed why i blogged about him again? (Actually, why is there an 'again' in the first place?)And i was kidding about the $10 thing. Either $40 or nothing. *winks winks* P/s: See, i also got dedicate posts to you. I'M FAIR, aren't i? *grins* P/p/s: I'm NOT going to update until he reads this. *smirks* BLAME HIM FOR ME NOT UPDATING. (Except for the class chalet thing.) Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Is ANdy cute or is ANdy cute?
GOSH. How can someone with geeky specs look as cute as ANdy? I mean, CMON, is he cute or is he cute?I wanted to upload his photos very very very much, but i doubt i could. Privacy, people, privacy. Understood-ed? NOW, ONLY ME SHALL SEE HOW CUTE HE IS. *cues evil laughter* (Well, *pssst*, his link is at my sidebar.) And he's also so SO skinny in real life. Skinner than me. AND taller some more. I'm SO jealous about his legs. But the saddest thing is that i had only seen him thrice in my entire life and i never went up to say hi. Cause he was with his friends every time. ): Saddening. ANYWAY, life moves on. And i was laughing all the way at the tags left by John and adisgustedreader in ANdy's blog. YOU KNOW WHAT'S ENTERTAINING? It is watching Now that's what i call PURE ENTERTAINMENT. Alright. But i'm sure it'll be annoying and irritating for ANdy. If it was me, i would have BAN their IP SERIES. Or at least nicely ask them to tag at haloscan. (which i think ANdy had already did so) Because tagboard fighting is such a wastage of space. HEY NO!! They aren't only wasting space on the tagboard. But also wasting our oxygen. Not only that, they give out carbon dioxide. GOSH!! THEY SHOULD DIE. Alright, maybe they shouldn't die. But how can they waste our oxygen too?? Geez. Anyway, back to topic. I read this a couple of days back, i think. Geek spectacles are among the trends,but already considered way back..so if you're wearing them last year, you're sure a geek but if you just got them recently.....i'll call it outdated. (CLICK TO READ THE WHOLE COMMENT) People who wears geek glasses, get ready your choppers and clubs, let's go BASH THAT GUY UP!!! Weets. Fashion is made by people. While most of time, media, yes. But it could also be created by ourselves. Norms people, social norms. Informal norms. YES, NORMS!!! Let's imagine this: Retro was the 'hot' then, in my dada and momo's time. Then retro went out of fashion in my lao jie's era. Then it came back in mine. (Just a few years back). Well, would you call people who wears retro in my sister's era outdated or leading the fashion? They could be followers from the previous season, but they could also be the ones leading the fashion for the people in my era. Alright. I think i might be confusing myself right now. And i haven't even bathed. At this time some more. PLUS I haven't even downloaded 6P for tomorrow's UT. AWESOME. JUST AWESOME. And i got this feeling that i went way off from what i wanted to do initially. Anyway, geeky glasses are not out of fashion. Plus ANdy looks damn cute in it. Though i know that guys don't like to be called cute, but he IS. P/s: Shall i go 'kop' some pictures with him in geeky specs? Friendster. Blog. I'm so tempted. :x P/p/s: EEEKKKKK, mentor is not helping us to pay for our camp money. HE isn't SUPPOSED TO. (Listen to the good stuff) *winks* Soon To Dada: 自甘墮落 倘若失敗 無怨與人 Anyway, there might be changes to chalet again. Will update about it soon. SOON!!! P/s: I will either take off or change the co-authors from this blog soon. Cause he's not updating. GAHS. Will take off by this Sunday. TAKE THAT!!
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Chalet details amongst all
WEETS!!! I'd just taken back my contacts from re-servicing.Finally, contacts had finished their NS. At least for these three months. YAY. No more spec-kys pictures. To think i had started to fell in love with my glasses. GOSH!! Anyway, dinner was FUN FUN FUN!!! We have two new mothers. Mama Jeff and Mama Haylie. They both had just given birth in MCD itself. NOO!! DON'T PUSH. DON'T PUSH. THINK FOR YOUR HEARTS!! AND LUNGS!!! *psst, i wonder who's the father though. HMMMMM* GAHS. I'm starting to love the mates in class. I am so SO going to miss them after these two weeks. And the class chalet is not making things better. It clashes with my EMP camp. Means either i run two sides, or i can only go for one day. EEEKKKK!! Nevermind, we shall see how things go. BUT I REALLY CAN'T WAIT FOR CHALET. Peeps!! Chalet, 18th - 20th August, in year 3014* @ CostaSands. Those who can make it, please tell Jeff (or GL or Mike or me) *grins* One premium (1 floor) is $150 for 3D2N. Duplex (2 floors) will be $185 for 3D2N. And NO. We haven't rent the room yet. (Sheesh) Will book after confirming with the numbers and money. AND WE BETTER BE QUICK. And peeps whom i know would be going: Jeff GL Me Haylie Frez ... ... Not too sure but WILL be forced by us: Ben Sha sha Juliet . . . And every other peeps in E36C!!! Gahs. GAHS. GAHS!!! OMIGOSH. So many things i want to buy. So little money. ): Life is harsh. ="= And pssst: Don't you think that the vocalist for YSJ in Superband looks so SO familiar to 12012's Wataru? And pssst pssst: DINNER WITH HAYLIE, FREZ, JEFF AND BEN IS SO SO SO SO FUNNY!! I WANNA HAVE DINNER WITH THEM EVERYDAY!!! And pssst pssst pssst: I have new favourite words adding on to my daily conversation. Chingfave.text = "weets" & "eeekkk" And pssst pssst psst pssst: Pssst is not my new fave word. It's just subsituting my P/s. ^^ Monday, July 28, 2008
Lazy people
Okay, i'm not very happy right now.I know all of us don't do what we preach but i'm getting to be a little not-too-happy (read: pissed) right now. I mean i don't mind telling you what are one or two points i wrote for RJ or even telling you where i had found my points. Apparently, telling you that i've gotten the points from Wiki is not enough. You still want the link? Yes, although i could google it and give you the link within a minute or two, but HEY, it's YOUR RJ right? And even when i told you it was on Wiki, you are still asking me for the link? Gosh. Please don't tell me that you had never used Wiki before. I hope you fully caught my scarcasm when i told you to "give me a min while i go google for you" EEEKKKK to lazy people. P/s: I like ANdyStorm's latest article. CLICK. GLASSES. Eeeekkkk Wheeeee. The fugly me with the fugly glasses. Tell me if this is a compliment or not?
EEEKKK!!! YOU CALL THIS A COMPLIMENT? At least what Sha sha said is nicer. She says i look more shu nu. LOOK only. Saddening. But i thought i look more educated in glasses. Read NERDISH!!! EEEEKKKK!!! Two more days in glasses. JUST TWO MORE!! Worser Things i had done TODAY (and today only):
Yes. I got this feeling that i might be really serious on this crush. I just hope it won't crush me. I wonder how come there are guys liking such a fugly me. I wonder. And the SCARIEST thing i've heard today is that MR. Nice Guy is that freaky idiotic jerk? Gosh, April. Is MR. Nice Guy's English THAT bad? And NO. MR. Nice Guy is in poly. Not someone without a decent school. He can speak in perfect Queen's English if he bothers to. But the truth is, after our 'O's, none of us are bothered to speak or write in good English. And April, even if that dumbass wanted to try and speak logically, he CAN'T. He's severely mentally challenged, remember? OH NO!! He's not mentally challenged. He's MUCH MORE WORSER than that. P/s: Is there such a word as 'worser'? Sunday, July 27, 2008
Joyce, shut up
MR. Nice Guy says:GAWD!! I can't seem to shut Joyce up. She's damn annoying. Trust me, when i mean DAMN annoying, i mean annoying till the fact that i feel like smacking her. But i can't. That's the catch. *sigh* JOYCE, JUST SHUT UP!!!!! She had been complaining about the fact that she had died umpteen times in Cabal and about her specs. And i had been laughing VERY VERY hard at her for both issues. First, i can't imagine how can she die in Cabal. She has over 100 HP pots and regeneration skill. How can she die? How did she manage that? How in the world? HOW? *surpress laughter* Next, she had been grumbling for days (two, to be exact) about the need to wear her specs to school. Poor girl. Contacts are being re-serviced. There's not much choice left, you see. Either you wear your glasses or you don't. AND you can't survive without glasses for you can't see past the end of your own nose without specs. *grins* YAR YAR... ... The fugly, nerdy, dorky, geeky specs. HA-HA IN YOUR FACE You think my trauma ends here? IMPOSSIBLE. She also had been ranting about her hair for the past few WEEKS!!! She had been grumbling about the black roots that's becoming more and more obvious as each day passes by. Apparently asking her to go for a root dye doesn't work for she seems like she wants to change her hair color to a lighter tone. Despite the fact that EVERYONE (and i seriously mean everyone) had asked her to go for a darker color. Even her optician had asked her BUT she doesn't want to heed our words. Don't heed the advice still ask for what? Funny ar? She said she is tired of having copper gold and wanted to go copper blonde. The color that she initially want. And you know what i foresee? I can literally see her coming to me and starting to complain about her dry hair from the dye. TELL ME WHAT KIND OF LIFE AM I EXACTLY LIVING RIGHT NOW?? GAWD!! 不被應許 原來人是不可以哭的 因爲一哭,就好難停下來 Confused or confused Gosh. I think that this time my crush is for real. That shouldn't happen. But i think it just did. I still can't believe i just rejected someone for him. Should i feel confused or ... ... confused? Busy I'm busy. So SO busy. I'm busy looking for quotes. I'm busy looking for icons. I'm busy looking up on horoscopes. I'm busy about not being really busy. P/s: I feel like getting a lighter color for my hair. Am i killing myself? ARGHS, nevermind, I still have two weeks to think about it. P/p/s: I wonder how is the class chalet coming along? P/p/p/s: I WISH MY BIRTHDAY IS HERE SOONER!!!!! Saturday, July 26, 2008
Silent ones
Somehow i feel lighter. Is that the power of tears? Seriously, i didn't want to cry. It's just that tears overflowed. I really didn't want it to. But days and weeks and months of suppression of tears is just too much. It just started to flowed out by itself. I didn't have to force it. It just silently flowed out. Along with all the emotions that i thought i didn't have. Anyway, i'm very grateful to MR. Nice Guy for being there. And a million thanks to him for spending time to help me update. He's a natural at writing. Fine. I shall call him MR. Nice Guy from today onwards. Unless we feel like disclosing his identity. Yes, you aren't a jerk. You're a nice guy. We all understand. ="= 600 times of Numb MR. Nice Guy says: Joyce is so addicted to Linkin Park's Numb that she had listened to it for more than SIX HUNDRED times. Yes, you've heard me. SIX HUNDRED FREAKING TIMES!!! She needs to have more things to do in life. And should move on too. *shakes head* And she refuses to blog because she insists on listening to Numb and do random stuff online. (Poor me has to use her cranky desktop which dies ever so easily on me and everyone else.) *peeks over her shoulder and saw her surfing emo icons and quotes and putting it into a powerpoint slide* GAWD. I'd told her RP is bad for her. It's a weekend and yet she is doing this? She should have appealed into SP, along with me. What the hell were she thinking all this while. It's not like she doesn't stand a chance if she appealed. Forget it. I shall go and game while she continue her EMOish stuff. God. I have no idea when was she into EMOish stuff. Last time i checked on her, it was still Visual. If she ever dresses like a hardcore emo punk girl, i am SO going to burn away all the clothes in her wardrobe. That'll teach her. *smirks* WHAT? I'm being nice and helping you to update, and yet you called me a jerk? What life. Damn. Joyce says: Yes, Mr. Nice Guy is a jerk. Believe it or not. He IS. Friday, July 25, 2008
what the hell is this?
As much as i wanted to do a serious update, i'm not.Cause i'm bored. ... ... Hey, not sounds like bored. WEETS. Apparently. All of you can see how much fun i'm getting (Change fun to boredom) Plus, i had finally sent in my contacts for reservicing. And WHAT?!?!!! WHAT IN THE WORLD DO YOU MEAN THAT IT WILL ONLY BE READY ON WEDNESDAY. Do you mean that i have to survive on glasses for both monday and tuesday? *shakes head* That's VERY unacceptable. And i hate my new spectacles. I UTTERLY regret spending $200 bucks on it. Every cent and dime from my own pockets. It's not ONLY fugly, but makes my world go round and round when i wear it. The degree is too strong in compared to my contacts and home specs. Obviously i was wearing a weaker degree lenses all these while. It's proven that the stronger of degree you wear, the easier your eyes gets damaged by it. So i'm just trying to do some damage control and here comes the strong degree specs. I literally can't walk in a straight line after wearing it. I'm acting like a pissed off drunkard with a terrible hangover. What do you mean how is that possible? Just drink the previous night. Gets damn drunk. Tries to sleep it off (but apparently fails). Wakes up with a terrible hangover. Drinks and get drunk again. That's how. And how do i know? I can't drink and that's why i know the feeling of getting drunk. More times than i feel comfortable about it. I share alcohol. Friends know my limits. They wouldn't DARE to let me get close to one full champagne glass of red wine. (Yes, yes. I drink red wine using champagne glasses. More wine more drunkards. More laughters and puking drunks too.) Anyway, as i was speaking, my glasses SUCK big time. And i really want to drink white wine. They're so deliciously sweet. Ditto to champagne too. Life moves on. Happily. And i've just manage to hold my bloody bladder for ONE FREAKING HOUR. Damn high tide. But still, i couldn't walk out of the movie half way, could i? WELL, maybe... JUST MAYBE... i SHOULD. Who cares about the people around and behind me. It's just their luck. *grins* But i AM a nice girl. Therefore, i just sat there shivering and holding my bladder. I swear, one more minute in that theatre, just ONE, i'm going to attain immortality. From internal bursting of pee. I hope i'm not the first one. And The Dark Knight ain't nice. It has psychopaths. But it doesn't play with psychology. DAMN. Liar game doesn't use psychopaths but yet played with more psychology than that Batman. GAWD!! Anyway, i like Joker. Cause he's a sadist. And i love sadists. Especially sadistic psychopaths. They just seem to be so much in my world. WELCOME TO ANGELTURNDEMON. Anyway, Joycelyn is coming back RRREEEAAALLLLLLIIIIII soon from her bath. (Note, i had been waiting for her ever since god knows when.) And how many of you people out there would believe that whatever you had just read is typed by someone who has more things to do in life than sitting behind a notebook trying to impersonate Joyce? And yes. If you hadn't believed it, i'm actually a guy. I can prove it to you if i want to. But no, i don't want to. And i shouldn't continue. Joyce doesn't gets too happy when she found out that i had touched her blog. Now, let's see when will she notice this post. And to Ching: I can only find the general place, not the exact location. But at least you do have the IP address. It doesn't really help, does it? This is Ching. And i don't use expletives. At least not as much nowadays, and definitely not as much as the ones that had appeared above. *smiles* And sheesh. Whatever i wanted to blog about is all mentioned. I shouldn't have told you what i wanted to blog about. GAHS!!! Remind me why i added you as an author again? Thursday, July 24, 2008
Crying
I don't cry with tears.I cry with words. Wednesday, July 23, 2008
I'M CONFUSED
As said in title
Loads of pictures. Alright. Sha sha said that my blog is heavily pictures-deprived. So this shall be an entry with LOADS of MY pictures. I really want to include some pictures of shuai ges, but i can't find any. Shucks. Too bad if any of you have to scroll through all these pictures with my face on it. Blame Sha sha if you want. :x Kidding!!! Anyway, i've tweaked the webcam settings to the extent that i can't even recognize myself in the pictures. Tell me if it's good or bad. HMM. HERE COMES THE My lunch. CUP NOODLES!!! GL bought spicy seafood. WHEN HE KNEW VERY WELL THAT I GRRS!! P/s: I took around 100 pictures just within an hour. All these uploaded ones were just a LITTLE portion out of all i had taken today. P/p/s: The oreo ham-bur-ger were GL's headset. The one i fell in love with and really wanted one too. THE SOUND QUALITY ARE FREAKISHLY GOOD!!! I want that headset. Anyone kind enough to sponsor? Pretty please? *tries to act cute* Feeling numb? Right. I shouldn't be blogging right now. Much less just finished bathing. GAHS!!! But at least i smell good now. ^^ Anyway, i feel as if i have so many things to talk about but yet nothing at the same time. It had already come to this point where i don't even feel like copying and pasting the thoughts i had about mainstream and underground music into blogger. GOSH, what's happening to me? Yes. And there is something i want to ask. How do you know that you're numb when you can't feel numb? Haylie replied that when we are numb, we feel nothing. But i was thinking, since i'm feeling nothing right now, does it means that i'm numb? I'm not feeling pain, not feeling joy, not annoyed, just feeling NOTHING, but does it means that i'm numb right now? If not, there must be a special feeling that is able to let me know that i'm numb right now. And if i put it that way, why can't i say that because of that FEELING, i'm feeling numb. Makes sense? Taking for example: I am numb because i feel the pins and needles in my leg. I feel numb because of the pins and needles in my leg. Retort me people. Just retort me. And NO. None of you guys can use the 'pins and needles' in ANY part of your explanation. Because i had used it in class and NONE of you agreed to it. HA! TAKE THAT!! And my eyes hurt again. Damn. P/s: I accidentally smsed You Liang when i initially wanted to text GL. Sorry. No wonder i couldn't make sense out of either side. P/p/s: Dinner with Thea and Norman at TRCC cafe this Friday. Anyone interested in joining? P/p/p/s: I LOVE GL'S HEADSET!!!!! It's simply out of this world. P/p/p/p/s: I started talking about the 'Numb' topic because i was listening to the song itself. ^^. Yes peeps, i'm STILL listening to the songs. HAYLIE, GL, FREZ, STOP COMMENTING ABOUT IT!!! xD Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Like duh?
Right. First of all, i should be sleeping.If not, i should be typing about my Hip hop RJ. But i'm doing neither and instead blogging.
Anyway, i've already typed up one entire page of entry in Microsoft Word about what my thoughts for mainstream and underground music. One entire page, in font 8 (i think). I shall post that up after Wednesday noon. Fine, make that Wednesday night. I shall be talking about 12012, Versailles, Linkin Park and Chord. And nope, that one page long entry isn't my RJ. I guess that my RJ would be WAYYY shorter than that. For i have no knowledge about hip hop. Fine, close to none, but not an absolute NO yet. But at least i'm willing to learn, alright? AND i've just realized that Luke replied my mail. Right, it was 2 days ago and ... ... OEI, IT'S NOT LIKE I DIDN'T REPLY HIM. I DID REPLY ONCE. THEN... i kinda Anyway!! I will be doing a little checking up of IP addresses. I had a couple of P/s: How great if RJ questions were a very general one and are able to let us write what's on our mind. (Psst, isn't that what RJ are for?) I can't say anything about lessons, but even talks? Owww, c'mon. Couldn't we at least have a broader and more general question. Like "Given a choice, would you prefer being a mainstream musician or an underground one? Why?" FINE!! I've attended a hip hop talk, so i have to talk about hip hop. FINE FINE, I GEDDIT!!! Stop screaming into my ear. Right, should i do my PDTs before i do that hip hop RJ or should i continue and do with whatever tacit knowledge i have? Hmm, TACIT KNOWLEDGE, HERE I COME!!! And BOO, no one is pon-ing tomorrow's lesson. Say until so nice. But it's just all talk and words. No actions. BOO!!! To be or not to be, that's a question. LIKE DUH?!?!!!!That was my MSN pm. Check out my nicks. It's fun. Monday, July 21, 2008
Counting my lucky stars
I shouldn't be blogging. I should be thinking about the hip-hop RJ. But i seriously can't think of anything. I know which one i wanted to choose, but i just didn't know how to put my reasons into words.Okay, i know more or less on what i want to write already. But let me procrastinate for a little while i refuse to start typing about it. ANYWAY... ... What's wrong with me chasing someone (literally around in circles). Or the matter of fact, running. I have two fat things attached to my hipbone, called legs. They can move in front of one another to initiate movement. And when they move with a certain degree of speed, they're called running. Yes, i can RUN. Anyway i was tempted to text both of them to turn to their side and say hi to each other. They apparently know each other, though not personally, but still, they KNEW each other. Just say HI!!! And and AND!!! Get Christianity stuff OUT of my life. Ever since i knew that Brandon had been part of that Mooncakes clique before, i was already trying very very hard to control myself. But things are getting out of hand. Seeing people reading bibles, listening to people worshipping, having caps with prints "Jesus is the boss" and car stickers with "Jesus is lord" is more than enough. I STILL HAVE TO SEE THE FACE OF LEONARD HOW. What in the world?!?!!!! Of all people, why him? On second thoughts, i rather seeing him than Wei Jie. Right, so i should count my lucky stars then. Strength reigns I am so SO tired of apologizing. But i guess i have to. For who else would apologize if i don't start first. S.O.R.R.Y. Yes, a 5 letter word that sometimes is harder to speak than I.LOVE.YOU. Seriously, i'm starting to wonder. How come it's so hard to say I LOVE YOU. Is it because of the rejection, or the after effects that brings after it. How come there will always be this awkwardness after someone is being rejected. Can't everyone still be friends? I wonder. Anyway, back to the topic. Don't have to worry about me, for i will be try to be the strong girl that all of you know. It's just a process. The cheerful girl will soon be back. Even if it's just a pretense. AND I HAD ENOUGH OF PEOPLE SIGNING IN AT THE SAME TIME. It's lagging my entire lappie down. GRRS!! I've become so numb Sunday, July 20, 2008
Tired of apologizing
I'm bored and confused.How great if life can go my way. WAIT. Will i be happy if i truly don't have to worry? I hate it when i find out things by myself. Sometimes, it's not that i don't want to care, but it's beyond caring. Family, friends. What else? It's so easy when it was friends. For who need friends anyway. But things just got so SO much more complicated when it concerns my family. I might not need friends, for there might not be even true ones around, but family? I can't live without my family. I need them, more than i can ever comprehend. Drastic situations require drastic moves. What else can i do now? Tell me something drastic. Tell me a drastic measure i can use. I need it. I need it terribly. As much as i LOVE to share your burden, but i seriously can't. It's not that i want to ignore your problems, but mine is already overpowering myself. I am already trying so hard not to be crushed by whatever i have on my shoulders that i seriously can't take the load for you anymore. One more load from any single one might just be enough to kill me. I seriously want to help you, but i can't. I seriously didn't want to flare up, but i'm just too emotional unstable. I can't be sad, so the only other emotion that can cover my sadness is anger. And the cough i'm having for weeks is not helping a single bit. I had enough of swallowing panadols during the breakout just to subside the pain for me to be able to last through the day. Or at least until the evening where the drug began to wear off and i'm feel the full impact of the pain again. I'm just waiting for my physical body to crumble so i didn't have to go through this aches anymore. Anyway, back to topic. I'm sorry for seeming not to be able to understand you. I know that our problems can never be put on a weighing scale to see if whose problems is more problematic than the other. For our own problems always seemed to be worse than others. If this applies to you, it most probably applies to me too. For we're all humans. If you feel that i can't understand you and your problems, it's the same with me. You think that whatever i'm going through is nothing, it applies to me too. I remember me for not being able to sleep for four days throughout the week before. There is just too many things for me to think about. Though i know that thinking about it doesn't make the problems any smaller, but i can't just can't help but to think. Throughout that week, i wonder when will i fall under exhaustion. I wanted too. I felt as if the world had came crumbling down throughout those days. Thursday night, i finally couldn't take it. I knocked out but it was still a fitful night. Nightmares haunted me throughout the night. When will this ever subside? Will it ever? I'm a big girl now. My shoulders are built to carry burdens. Here i am, trying hard to be strong. Please, don't push me or add any more burdens to me. For i'm not sure how much strength i had left. Both physically and emotionally. Lovelife I suddenly thought about lovelife whom had came into my world about a year ago. Lovelife might be one of the people who knew about how my heart feels during the time when i was labeled as a problematic backslider. I didn't even had any idea if lovelife was a girl or a guy. He had actions of what a girl would do, but she had styles of a guy. ARGHS!! Googling doesn't help either. I wonder if lovelife would see this entry. If you do, please mail me once again. Still friends? 我其實不堅強 你們知道鯊魚的故事嗎? 幾個研究鯊魚的科學傢有一次做了一個實驗。他們把一條小鯊魚放在一個很大的魚缸裏。然後再用一個非常強的壓克力板把魚缸分爲兩部分。在另外一個部分放入色彩奪目的魚兒。 小鯊魚一看到那些色彩繽紛的魚兒就想游過去,吃掉他們。不過壓克力片非常的堅固,無論鯊魚多麽用力的撞那壓克力片,它就是撞不破。 科學家也定時的在小鯊魚住的魚缸部分放入食物,所以小鯊魚也不怕餓着。 前幾天,小鯊魚根本不放棄。天天撞著那壓克力片。每當壓克力片被撞出了裂痕,科學傢就會把壓克力片換成更厚的。 小鯊魚天天的撞,撞得自己都受傷了。也不知道自己留了多少的血。 兩個星期過去了,小鯊魚不再撞那壓克力板了。他每天都等著科學家放入魚兒進他魚缸的部分,然後用它敏捷的身手來鋪捉他的獵物。 科學家也在這個時候進入試驗的第二步驟,就是把壓克力板拿出來。 即使如此,小鯊魚也沒有在嘗試著有過去那色彩奪目的小魚兒那裏。那些色彩艷麗的小魚兒就像是牆壁上的壁畫,根本引不起小鯊魚的興趣。小鯊魚也只對科學家放入的魚兒感興趣。 但,如果那些科學家放入的魚兒游去色彩奪目的魚兒那裏,鯊魚就會立刻放棄追逐。 科學家看了都笑說,鯊魚怎麽可能是海里最兇猛的魚類呢? 不過,戀人明白鯊魚爲什麽會怎麽做。 因爲怕痛。他們都怕痛。 沒有落淚的原因到底是什麽? 是因爲自己故作堅強? 還是因爲自己的懦弱? 我自認 我不敢落淚 因爲我非常的膽怯 我害怕 我怕痛 我不敢哭泣 我不願讓傷心的事情留在心裡 不是我看得開 而是我不會面對 我是個孬種 但那又如何? 我也許害怕現實 但我不畏懼生活 我也許逃避痛楚 但我願承受後果 我也許還很懦弱 但我會學習堅強 我現在不敢落淚 讓我再來問問你 那… 又如何? 網絡 Friendster 虛擬世界 我的第三空間 要是什麽就是什麽 想儅吸血鬼就儅吸血鬼 想儅什麽就儅什麽 漸漸的 我在也不是自己了 我只是自己虛造出來的人物 慢慢的 我開始不知道自己是誰了 我一直在網絡世界假裝自己沒事 不過其實 我心裡還是需要扶持的 「人」本來這兩個比劃 就是互相支撐來構造的 素顏的愛 真的存在嗎? 在我上了厚厚的妝的心靈 還可能存在素顏的愛嗎? HTML I can't remember the last time i touched HTML codes. Too much VB and VBA made me forgot all my HTML. I can't even remember one simple code for the font. *wagging finger at myself* GAHS!! IQ scores GOSH. I've become fatter AND dumber. What a combo. My IQ score is just a pathetic 135. I must be way clever than that. I just KNOW i am. Visual MathematicianYour IQ Score is: 135 You have a strong ability to process visual-spatial and mathematical information. These skills combined with your strengths in logic are what make you a Visual Mathematician.You're able to understand patterns visually and in numbers. That means your mind can create a mental picture for any problem. In addition to that skill, you possess an intelligence that allows you to apply math to that picture, too. That helps you manipulate multiple parts of the picture (or problem) to come up with a solution. You have many skills that are critical to success and problem-solving. Your talents help you understand the "big picture," which is partly why people may turn to you for direction — especially in the workplace. You flourish in environments where tasks are clearly defined, and you are a whiz at improving processes and making things more efficient. Your ability to detect patterns and your skills in math and logic, make it natural for you to come up with ideas and theories that simplify processes for everyone. Outside of work, Visual Mathematicians tend to do well at strategic activities like chess. It must be that ability to recognize patterns — both as they are and how they develop. Regardless of how you put your mind to use, you've got a great set of talents. You will be able to envision a clear path and calculate the risks, and more importantly, the rewards, of anything you take on So QUIT telling me that it is unfair for me to get As for Maths. AND I DID PASS MY A MATHS IN O LEVELS. I SERIOUSLY DID PASS!!! Taggies!! WEETS!! I just wanna do some surveys without tagging anyone. Because i don't have enough friends to make up 10 peeps, so whoever who sees this, take it that YOU'RE TAGGED!!! 1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be? i'll kill him, chop him, sue him, slap him, smack him, kick him NOT!! But MOST PROLLY move on in life with disappointment? LOL 2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be? I want all my dreams to come true (politically correct answer xD) 3. What will your dream wedding be like? URMS. Nice, nice and NICE? *let me see my jie's one before i do this* 4. Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you? YES. Im a very confused child. LOL. 5. What's your ideal lover like? like HIM? *winks* 6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone? Being loved. DARE TO DISAGREE? 7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love? well, until someone else whom i really really love comes along? ^^ 8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do? Life is harsh, but we MOVE ON. 9. Is there anything that's made you unhappy these days? FIRST, my family. SECOND, myself. THIRD, the people in my life. FOURTH, everything in my life. HEH 10. Is being tagged fun? YES. i LOVE taggies. 11. How do you see yourself in ten years time? I'm going onto 17 soon. So when i'm 27, i should be working? 12. Who are currently the most important to you? My family, my friends, the people around me and YOU? ^^ 1. What is the most random object around you? Pencil sharpener 2. When is your birthday? December 27 3. What were you doing at 8:00 this morning? Woke up, talk to dada, went back to sleep 4. What were you doing 30 minutes ago? Enjoying the oh-so-delicious (but fattening) KFC 5. Last place you took a train to? School? 6. Do you like your life as of now? Yes, but things can be so SO much better 7. Last thing you purchased? Specs 8. Four words to explain why you last threw up? Something must be wrong 9. How’s your mood lately? Dying but pretending to be fine 10. Where did your last hug take place? In front of my piano, just before momo go for work 11. What are your plans for the weekend? Sleep. Game. MSN. Listen to some of the tracks which I don’t even know existed. 12. Ever kissed someone who smokes? No, and hope I would never 13. Did you have a good birthday this year? I hope so. It ain’t here yet 14. Are you tired right now? Nah, for I woke up less than an hour ago. 15. Do you chew on your straws? Sometimes I just enjoy doing it when I get a tad too bored 16. What’s your favorite room in your house? Bedroom, where I do almost everything in there 17. How many children do you plan on having? Not at the moment, but who knows about the future 18. Is your hair curly? Nope, it initially was, but after a year of doing everything I can to stop it from curling, it’s finally not THAT curly anymore. 19. Who was at your house last? Can’t remember 20. Where is your first love? I hope he’s dead. But sadly nope, he just viewed me on Friendster. 21. Are you able to climb a chain link fence? Nope. There’s none. 22. Who’s car were you in last? Dada’s? 23. What did you do last Thursday night? Let’s try and recall 24. What color shirt are you wearing? Blue 25. How long is your hair? A tad longer than yesterday but a little shorter than tomorrow 26. Where did you sleep last night? On my bed? Where else? 27. Who was the last person to tell you they love you? Momo, I love her too 28. Are you ashamed of your past? I would, but I stood over it and NOT ANYMORE. They were the ones which made me stronger 29. Where is your phone? On the shelf beside my bed 30. Are you going on vacation in the summer? Nope, if I’m not wrong, summer had past. 31. Do looks matter? They shouldn't, but they are 32. Texting right now? Nope 33. Do you trust people? I would love to say yes, but sadly, no. P/s: Alright, i was kidding when i say that i did not have enough friends to make up 10 peeps. Relax, all of your are still my besties. ^^ P/p/s: And oh yes, if you had done this, leave a message either at the shoutout box at the side or a comment at the end of every entry so i can pop by and see your answer. CHEERIOS. (: Heavier and fatter I'm not going to eat lunches or dinners for at least two weeks straight. I AM GETTING TO BE SO MUCH HEAVIER AND FATTER!!!!! P/s: Shall start tomorrow. Weekends are not suited for diets. *thinks about yesterday's zi char dinner and today's KFC lunch* Cry 誰說哭不能解決問題 如果哭完還能把問題解決 那才是王道 所以 那就放聲大哭吧 HA! Are you trying to kid me? 儅我落淚的時候 是你叫我停止哭泣的 而儅我不想落淚 也是你叫我放聲大哭 這是什麽跟什麽嘛?!?!?!!! FAT HOPE!! YOU WILL NEVER SEE ME CRY. N.E.V.E.R.E.V.E.R. Saturday, July 19, 2008
Tell me
I am in need of money. Tell me what i can do?I am bored. Tell me something else i can do. Mooncakes I seriously didn't want to spam-blog. BUT I CAN'T HELP IT!!! OMIGOSH!!! OH GOD!!! GAWD!!! RAWRS!!!! ROARS!!!! LALALALALALA!!! *breathes in deep and hard* *exhales* *hyperventilates* *gains back composure* OKAY, THOSE ON TOP WERE JUST TO LET ALL OF YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL NOW. Brandon (EMP senior), IS PART OF MOONCAKES BEFORE!!! What's the big deal, you ask? He's part of Wei Tze, Christopher, Alumn and gang. Which means... ... *shivers upon thinking about it* I HOPE HE DOES KNOW WEIJIE!!! Is Weijie in Northbrooks? Is he? Is he? I CAN'T REMEMBER. I CAN'T EVEN THINK STRAIGHT. The time of shock is over. The time of panicking is HERE. I seriously hope he had never step into hogc before. If he did, i might jolly well be freaked out and away. Highcuts GOSH. Momo almost killed my highcuts. YADAH YADAH YADAH Yea, i know my mum is much more important than my highcuts, but that pair of freaking shoes cost me around $60 plus? Or was that $80 plus? Anyway, as i was saying, i had always paid for my own stuff and so that's why i hate people who tried to touch it. It is irritating to know that you have paid for it and only to find it ruin by other people. I had always kept my highcuts at the side of the door in a paper bag, so it wouldn't dirty the floor and the shoes wouldn't be limp and fall all over the place. But then, momo threw the paper bag away and stuffed my highcuts into a box outside the house. Because it's a HIGHcut, so it'll be virtually impossible to put it nicely into the box. So she decided to FOLD my highcuts in order for it to fit into the box. IMAGINE MY HEARTACHE!!! It'll not only cause a mark on the shoes but also increase the chance of ruining the zipper. And when i told her that, she asked me to put it outside without the box. Then i'm like, this shoe is much more expensive than all the other shoes i had bought added up together (obviously a lie, but she believed), and momo said she don't want it in the house. I was not very happy because i don't think my highcuts belonged outside with all the other whinny pathetic shoes. He should be special and be in the house. :x And i was telling momo that i had put it in a paper bag and it wouldn't dirty the house and it can 'stand' in the bag itself. Which it is what i want it to do. And what's more, this pair isn't very cheap itself. After a long time, momo finally accepted and say, "Can find a paper bag that can put then say". I beamed and i know the battle had won. FOR I ALWAYS KEEP THE PAPERBAGS. After two minutes of skipping into the room and find one nice paper bag, i walked into the living room beaming with pride. I know i had won. But momo is not going to take this smirk lying down. She said she was thinking of putting cardboard strips into the shoes to make it stand. IT LITERALLY WIPED THE SMIRK OF MY FACE AS I KNEW THAT THE SHARP EDGES OF CARDBOARD BOXES WOULD DO MORE HARM THAN GOOD TO MY SHOES. Lesson of the day: Don't underestimate mums. They can do worse things than you can imagine. P/s: Who can remember the looks of my highcuts? I wore it for a consecutive two or three weeks to school. *grins* Trance Alright, i just woke up, i just replied emails and now i am going to blog a really short one before i go and wash up. ~~~ TRANCE ~~~
TELL ME, IS THIS AWESOME OR IS THIS AWESOME? Friday, July 18, 2008
I become so numb
Alright. This is one of those picture-less entries with loads and loads of words.Anyway, i've just went to place the deposit for my spectacles. It wasn't very nice and i didn't really like it personally very much. But i'm in urgent need of glasses and i got the first one i saw. I am so going to And what's more. I'm not one of those who looks good in spectacles. GRRS!!! To add on, my contacts need to be sent in for servicing (i wonder how come it sounds so much like my lappie). Which means i would be contacts-less for a few days at least. CLASS PEEPS, YOU GUYS CAN FINALLY SEE ME REAL LIFE IN GLASSES. GAWD!!! And i was also starting to wonder lately, if the swelling in my eyes were caused by the collection of tears that i refused to let them flow out lately. But in any case, here comes the saviour, SPECTACLES!!! At least i don't have to worry about worsening the swell in my eyes. It will heal by itself (i hope). So many times, for so many times Tears were just at the tip of my lashes Threatening to drop For yet so many times again I refused to let it fall If i felt like crying for a gazillion times I had already stop myself for a gazillion times Crying doesn't make me any more human So why should i? I don't need sympathy I don't need fake concerns What i want is myself The true me I don't want people to care for me just because i cried I don't want people to be concerned for me just because i teared The only reason i want to cry Would be that the true self asked me to For how many times i felt sad For how many times i felt betrayed For how many times i felt alone For how many times i felt weak For how many times i felt confused For how many times i felt fear For how many times i felt freaked out For how many times i felt like crying... ... For so many times, I couldn't let myself cry If someone small can bring me down I must be smaller than that And i don't wanna be that way Even if it's all just a pretense I don't care anymore I am not going to care if my heart is dying I am just going to pretend that everything is alright I am not going to care if my heart had been broken and will never to be pieced again I am just going to pretend that my heart is still fine I am not going to care about whatever my heart is going to tell me anymore I am just going to pretend that i'm still the strong girl that i had always pretented to be The world just can't seem to allow me to be weak I just can't seem to allow myself to be weak I need protection But i don't want them I need you But i don't want you I need love But i don't want love I need to cry But i don't want to cry My eyes are hurting every second Threatening to let tears flowed out My heart is bleeding every minute Threatening to crumble me down My mind is confusing itself every time Threatening to tear me into pieces But i am not going to care I'm just going to pretend I'm becoming so numb I just can't see the path ahead of me I'm just falling apart I'm just so tired and exhausted But all the things just seemed so clear It's more than i can take, That's for sure And i might end up failing too But i don't care I'm just going to continue to pretend that everything's alright Alright. Moving on to happier things. So many things. So little time. Anyway, let's start WAYYYYY from the top. I met HH on 902 while going to school. He got a seat while i don't. ): But i took things to my advantage and threw him my lappie and jacket and made him hold it for me. REGARDLESS HE LIKE IT OR NOT. HA! TAKE THAT! And i wasn't paying ANY amount of attention during the entire day until it was the time for me to present. In which we were the last team to present. I were stoning, friendstering, doing all sort of things except listening to the faci. AND BEFORE FINGERS STARTS TO POINT AT ME, I FINISHED MY SHARE OF WORK KIES? And there was this Anyway, during the second breakout, i was telling GL about my VPN being down for a month and counting, and he asked me to talk to the IT helpdesk via communicator. And in which when they couldn't solve it, they referred me to the remote assistance engineer. IT WAS SO FUN LUR!!!!! Initially i was quite pissed with the engineer because he uh huh?? I see cursors moving by itself. Windows minimizing by itself. Words being typed by itself in the place where i'm supposed to type while chatting. Lappie restarting by itself. Things being downloaded without me clicking. BECAUSE IT'S REMOTE CONTROL. DUH?!?!!! And GL was saying, since they can see whatever i am doing to my screen, we can actually play a trick on them. He was saying that we type 'motherfucking slow' into the space where i'm supposed to type my message and then backspaced it. And this will SURE to piss him off. :x But being nice people, i stopped GL and HH from doing that to him. AND AND AND!!! Ever since the password for staff VPN had changed, the guys were all so depressed and had moped about it for DAYS (and weeks and months). And when GL realized that the old admin password were the same as the old staff VPN password, scheming ideas literally popped up from GL, HH, GH and Jeff's mind. ALL of them literally asked the engineer for the new password. While HH and me were skeptical about it and thought that the engineer wouldn't give it out, BUT THE ENGINEER DID!!! The five of us were whooping, laughing, punching the air and couldn't believe that it was THIS easy. (I rarely gamed, but i still do.) But then, life isn't all that nice with roses and blood. (Ooooh, blood) It didn't work out for the staff VPN. DRATS. Those 4 guys were so SO disappointed. While i was rubbing in and laughing my head off. Anyway, after this big wooha between us, it was time for presentation. And it's time for me to talk about this Anyway, when i call someone bastard, it means i still have a certain degree of respect to a certain extent for i personally think 'Bastard' is quite a nice song. But when i'm talking about bitch(es), then it's a different case altogether. AND OH YES, BEFORE I GET INTO TROUBLE, LET ME INSIST, BITCH = FEMALE DOG. *smiles* And yes, back to the While our team presented, that female faci (i didn't know her name), was against our team/Suhari. They And while all those, HH MSNed me and said "No wonder her whole class pon". HA! I thought so too. And GL were even awesomer. He asked our faci herself did her friend (that faci)'s whole class pon. POOR FACI. NO ONE WANTS YOU. Mwahahhahaha!!!! BUT. (here comes the big BUT)Yea. See how big it is? SUHARI SAID THAT HE FIND THE irritating FACI QUITE CUTE!!! AND WAS SEXUALLY HIGH FROM HER. Gosh. Of all people, why her? People seriously have varying definitions of cuteness for a 26 and 16 year old. And no thanks to me and GL, almost half the class knows about his sexual attraction. *grins* He didn't asked us to keep it a secret anyway. And oh yes, if no one gets him, it was a JOKE. I finally came to an acceptance that not a lot of people can get what i'm saying. Especially when i'm kidding. ANNOYING FOLKS!! Anyway, i'm listening to Linkin Park's 'Numb'. I find it not too bad. Reminds me of the performance by the EMP seniors. *smiles to myself* Thursday, July 17, 2008
April and Ben left... AGAIN
Don't ask how nonchalant i feel now.Anyway, Ben, Frez and Haylie ain't coming for Club Sounds II. Said that the part 1 was too boring. Even April is also complaining next to me NOW. ARGHS!!! NOOO!! Don't go home. Lest that mentor come and try to pry some reason out from me and i couldn't have any answer for him. Alright. Moving on. Benjamin Vinod punched me in the eyes? Like NO? It's just that my right eye is a tad swollen. Just a tad, i swear!! And GL had managed to scare WL out. I promise i will not laugh at her. I will try to. *suppress laughter* Initially i was supposed to go out with Jeff and the rest. But FIRST, he wanted to go clubbing or pubbing which i can't. No money and underage. SECOND, i have club sounds. And GAHS!!! April and Benjamin Vinod left. JUST. Alright, you didn't know they left because of boredom. DOUBLE GAHS. I'm so damn hungry. Give me some food. *sings* Gimme gimme more. Gimme gimme more. Alright. Shall the class pon next Tuesday to go to Mandai Zoo? But WAIT, do we have UT on that day first? Fine. I shouldn't blog. For i am all alone now. No one on my right and no one on my left. So some pictures to scare all of you. And yes, i'm STILL damn hungry. Alright. I lied. I am still blogging now. The feeling of being ignored I didn't plan for this, serious, i didn't My initial thought was just to protect a friend The initial point was not to scold you at all I never thought that it would bring forward such a big reaction I'm sorry I really am. And who says that girls are more petty than guys. Even though i'm quarreling with Ben, but i still talk to him, play MSN games with him (NOT just for the sake of winning him, i insist), joke with him, work with him and YES!!! I am supposed to and still angry with him. But some guys are just much more worse than me. I thought guys should be more magnanimous than girls. But i had been ignored for an entire week. Tell me that guys are more magnanimous than girls again? I WILL NEVER BELIEVE IT ANYMORE!!! And now, i'm seeing a drum machine. And this is enticing. Now i wonder why did i even bother to learn drums when i can easily play them using a drum machine. OMIGOSH!!! LUKE CAN REALLY USE THAT MACHINE!! IT'S DAMN NICE!!! P/s: Die. I realized that after listening to so many songs, i can't differentiate between open and closed high hats. The thing that i could easily differentiate with SO MUCH ease in the past. TACIT KNOWLEDGE, COME BACK TO ME!!!!! And gosh. I'm so going to pay full attention to Luke. Will update again. |
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Joycelyn
That's me in the picture.And my boyf. Hate me or love me People I read
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