Me & You, Forever ♥

Monday, February 25, 2008

The time has come

The previous post was plain crap. Was blogging in a very tired state yesterday. Thus, the outcome was outright BAD.

Anyway, i realized that i'm only blogging when i'm tired. Like now. Have such a strong desire to fall back into my warm and welcoming bed. Damn. I'm getting so lazy (and fat) lately. Shall die. But as a happy and lazy person. *laughs*

Back to the topic i had with Thea yesterday. Wei Jie and her is history already. So might as well stop talking about it. But another thing we've talked about yesterday, was guys in church. I can't really remember how we linked there. But if i wasn't wrong, it's like me asking, "Got good guys in church mehz? How come i can't see any sia?" Then, out came some names that Shu Jun was currently crushing on. And i've tried to evaluate them using logical skills.

Ling Jie : No comments about him, except he's a great chef. Main reason i wouldn't like about him is when Roy asked me (in front of leaders) how would i talk to him. And i'm like, i have no idea. I don't even know him personally. Damn. Anyway, he's a great guy to hang out with. Though i didn't really sit down and talk to him, therefore, NO COMMENTS.

Melvin : Head of ministry of lights. No idea who he is, except that the guy working in Alice 88th knows him. And was friends with him since secondary one. I have no idea how he looks like, much less his personality.

Ivan Poh : He looks like he's from a mixed blood family. Got the 混血兒 look. Very nice looking. Plus, very funny. And very scary when fierce. Glad that i've no direct contact with him in church before. But he can seriously be very funny if he wants to.

Jia Yang : He seriously looks very good. Very very nice looking. But that's for the first few times you see him. After some time, you will get tired of it. But nonetheless, still very shuai.

Roy : Damn. I have a personal grudge against him. Therefore, didn't really like him. He asked me directly if i was SAed when i was young. (Yes, HIM!!) And he cursed April to go down to meet Lucifer (aka go down to hell) in front of Thea. How would someone like him? Not me, that's for sure. But anyway, he has an awesome voice. Very nice.

That's about all that Thea has told me. Though i might not sound very kind in whatever i wrote on top. But that was what i thought. And the government had always supported the idea of freedom of speech right? The 有話就說, right?

But anyway, nobody is perfect. (Coincidentally, i'm a nobody. *grins*) And i digress. I meant, no one's perfect. But they're always the best in Christ's eyes. And that's the most important thing right? So there shouldn't be anyone that was even thinking of flaming me for what i've written above. *grins even wider* Much less scold me in my face.

BAH. If anyone does that, i shall take it. As an ENTERTAINMENT. But, i'm going back this Sunday. And i'm so freaking worried. Not because of meeting the people. Cause they ain't my priority anymore. So why should i care about them. But i've heard that pastors are preaching about the end of the world this weekend. Why should i even go. To further confirm that i'm going down to meet Lucifer? Double damn. I'm so freaking-ishly worried. Very scared. But on second thoughts, going down to hell ain't all that scary. Hell on earth is worse. And it's a confirmation that hell on earth will break lose when that day is nearing.

I suddenly felt like i want to know Issac. (No april, not the Issac you know) His church suddenly seems so much better. *gulps* GUO QUAN, INTRO ME TO YOUR CHURCH LEH.

Anyway, i'm not sure if this is good. But i feel that being un-churched is not entirely a bad thing. I can still say i'm a child of God. I pray before i sleep. I thank God for things He had so graciously given me. But, April shared one thing with Thea and i yesterday. There could be sinners in heaven, and also pastors in hell. Sinners in heaven because they repented and thus God recognized them as His child. And pastors in hell because they shared the wrong stuff and led the people closer to themselves rather than God.

And i met a lot of people (no idea why) and all were so coincidentally backsliders from HoGc. Alright, maybe not a lot, but some i have not seen for months and months. Suddenly saw him one day, and he remembered me. That's the main thing. And after chatting, we found out, how HoGc works, is quite weird.

A lot of them said things that were true, and they knocked it into my head. Though i might have came to know and understand all these stuff and facts perfectly, but i couldn't accept it. Maybe deep in my heart, it was cultivated that pastors were the two people that i respected the most. And church was the first thing in my heart. Leaders are always before me. People first and everything. It was so deep that sub-consciously, i refused to believe the facts that were shown right in front of me. Until these few weeks, i met Ugine and Guo Quan. And of course, Thea.

And nobody hit me as well as Guo Quan did. The things he told me was so true that i can't even fend it off. He didn't go against pastors or leaders. It's just the WAY that all of them did. Not personally. But the way they handle stuff. I had no other choice but to agree. We all worked very closely with leaders before. (Why?!?!) And whatever he says, shone light upon me. He's in another church now. It's a traditional church and nothing is wrong with that.

April too shared. She was working in a Christian field and they'll pray everyday. And even though it's in a office, the presence of God is always there. But, in the auditorium, filled with worshiping on-fire Christians, the presence seems to be not as strong.

And this reminded me of another point that Guo Quan shared. The 'on-fire' ones. They seems to make things into an obligation. Not that we want. But we have. Think about this. "If you're on fire, you will come down for service.", "If you're on fire, you will believe in God and pledge more money.", "If you're on fire, you will come down for CG rather than your CCA." and stuff like that. I was thinking, and i can't help but agree. They make into such an obligation that i even put my people and paper work in front of studies. Resulting in such poor mid year results. Luckily i got out around July. And managed to pull my scores in prelims up to 19. And O levels of 11. I can't imagine what the result will be if i had continue to stay in there. (And why is everyone telling me that i'm very dumb to go into RP when i scored 11. Cannot meh? DMAT don't want me mah, so go to DSA lor. I want to learn music and sound mah. Cannot meh?)

But anyway, i'm in no position to judge against a church. I will only leave things on how it should be. I just pray that all well shall end well, and things will not turn for a worse when we go back on Sunday. And even though, i'm not very close with Father all these while, but i'm always a child of God. Even if i had to go down to hell when the end comes, i know i will still be a child of God. Cause, i promised to be His child and nothing could change that.

Anyway, let me digress. I saw this guy at Alice 88th yesterday with very nice hair. I couldn't really remember how he looks like, but his hair looks very close to this. This picture is not his, but someone i saw on Friendster. But their hairstyle is almost 100% identical. Alright, maybe the guy i saw in Alice 88th has longer hair at the back, by maybe a 1 cm?

This is the picture. Chio hair right?