Me & You, Forever ♥

Monday, March 3, 2008

Warning: A LOT OF EXPLETIVES

Alright, before i start to type anything else...

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES BLOODY DUMB ASSHOLES

Yes, any Christians should have leave this page by now. Good. I was so bloody pissed off by dumb people today. It wasn't so bad until Thea told me what happened.

I went back to HoGc today, and believe me. It sucks... ... big time. I didn't know that was how pastors and leaders think of me. Damn those people.

So, i'm the bad guy over here now? I am the bad influencer over here now? Hey look, when i rose up because of wisdom and having the ability to influence people, all of you leaders are so happy to use this trait of mine. After i backslided, you think my power of influencing will affect your people?

Damn it, i wouldn't pull any of your people away. It's YOUR people who are attracted and willing to get influenced by me. I didn't do anything. I even took special attention NOT to talk to any other church members except for the guy you sent to look after us. And even so, i DID NOT talk a lot to him. Fuck you all leaders. Damn it. I'm so freaking pissed off. Get your freaking facts right before you judge.

And now what? I influenced Thea to wear goth? Right. I only bought my first two sets of goth on 25th DECEMBER last year. Barely 3 months till date alright? I think Thea might even got her waloli set earlier than me. Me influencing her? GET YOUR DUMB FACTS RIGHT FIRST.

And all the leaders started to try to separate Thea and me. Good move. BRILLANT MOVE. SO I AM THE BAD GUY OVER HERE RIGHT NOW. I WILL TRY TO TAKE NOTE OF THAT.

FOLIATE ALL OF YOU. WHEN I WAS STILL A LEADER, ALL OF YOU SAY THAT I'M A GOOD INFLUENCER. NOW THAT I BACKSLIDED, I AM THE BAD ONE. C'MON. IS IT JUST BECAUSE I HAD OUTLIVED MY USEFULNESS AND THUS YOU CAN JUST SHOVE ME ASIDE LIKE SOME TORN ROTTEN DOLL? FUCK YOU. AS IF I WILL ALLOW THAT TO HAPPEN TO ME.

I have legs and i will strut out with my head held high. Because i stand in the light and i know that i had did nothing against my conscience against any of you and your people. (Except scolding expletives here)

And you, Ivan Poh. I initially thought that you are a good person. But alas, that was just my THOUGHT. Reality is never the same. I seemed to forgot that you're STILL YET ANOTHER leader in church. And you are just like ANY OTHER LEADER. Had i went against you? Had i did anything against you? I didn't even KNOW you knew me. I was NEVER under you. I didn't even know you personally. So who are YOU to talk bad stuff about me? Who are YOU to judge me? Do i look like someone who kills people on a daily basis? And to hell when you said that people who wears Victorian Goth is fierce. IT'S A STYLE. IT'S A CLOTHING. IT'S A FASHION. WHAT DOES IT HAVE TO DO WITH MY PERSONALITY? So Ivan Poh, is it to you that any person who wears EMO on the street would have cuts on their wrists? Or will they self mutilate? Dumb ass.

As for the Weimin, Shu Jun, Hong Hwee diao-ing case, i didn't see it. So i wouldn't have any extra comments about it. Unless Thea tells me more about it. I was so dumb. I didn't know how pastors and leaders were treating me in this one freaking day only until Thea told me. I didn't even KNOW that i did something wrong. I didn't even realize that i can be blacklisted just by doing nothing.

To think that i was concerned over SJ when i heard that she was raped. I was asking did anyone settle this problem for her and everything. To think i was truly concerned. Damn her. I shouldn't feel so much for her. She was the one that backstabbed April and i. Why should i be so concerned for her when she treats us like NOTHING. NOTHING!!!

Forget it. Don't feel like blogging anymore. Just going to end off by saying

REAL MAN AND WOMAN WORSHIP? BAH. REAL MAN AND WOMAN ADMIT THE THINGS THEY DO AND WHEN THEY WANT TO TALK BAD ABOUT SOMEONE, THEY DO IT IN THEIR FACES!!!

Updates: It's not that i want to say bad things about your pastors. But it is YOUR pastors who said bad things about me first.

1) PEOPLE WORSHIP FROM THEIR HEARTS NOT THEIR LEGS.

2) IF PEOPLE IS NOT WORSHIPING FROM THEIR HEARTS, MIGHT AS WELL DON'T

3) PEOPLE LOOK AROUND BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED IN WHATEVER YOU'RE PREACHING

4) PEOPLE WILL LOOK AT YOUR DRUMMER NOT BECAUSE HE'S HANDSOME OR CUTE, BECAUSE PEOPLE LOVE DRUMS AND WANT TO LOOK AT HIM PLAYING DRUMS.

5) PEOPLE WILL GET INFLUENCED BY OTHER PEOPLE IS BECAUSE YOUR INFLUENCE OVER THEM IS NOT STRONG (and true) ENOUGH

6) PEOPLE KEEP LOOKING AT THE TIME BECAUSE YOUR SERMON IS NOT INTERESTING ENOUGH AND YOU HAD EXCEEDED THE TIME AND PEOPLE HAVE THINGS ON AFTER YOUR SERVICE

7) PEOPLE WILL FOLD THEIR ARMS BECAUSE IT'S A HABIT

8) The 'PEOPLE' is basically Yours Truly over here.

And i'm sure the list can go on. But it's just that i had no memories of it anymore. Yes, that's what the pastors said about me. But then again, why do i even want to stand during praise and worship when

1) I'm not praising and worshiping

2) The praise and worship didn't draw down the presence of God

3) The praise and worship songs ain't very nice

4) I respect God with my heart, not my legs (the world sees on the outside, but God sees on the inside, right HoGc people? No, i hear once again?)

5) MY LEGS ARE TIRED. STAND FOR ONE HOUR. I'M NOT AN ON FIRE CHRISTIAN, CAN A NOT?

If i wasn't once on fire, i would have jolly well went back to be a freethinker. Damn it. I should consider this option. THANKS FOR MAKING ME TO CONSIDER ABOUT BACKSLIDING COMPLETELY, HOGC PEOPLE!!!